Kanye has dedicated a song to his new girlfriend, and called it ''Perfect Bitch''. Apparently reality star Kim Kardashian is happy to be referred to as a ''perfect bitch'', in fact she supposedly said to her friends that she loved it, and that it was an honour. Kanye clearly wanted to write a lovely song about his new girl, but in hip hop, soppy love stuff is forbidden.

Kanye West says Cheryl Cole will take over the world. Come on man, there''s jumping on a PR bandwagon, and then there''s straight up doomsday predictions.

He filmed a 'funny' commercial for the VMA's. Lyrically witty? Yes. Able to craft incredible hip hop? Of course. Able to be funny on camera? Not so much. Oh and obviously Kim's in the video too, however her acting is outstanding. Did you know she's playing Ophelia at the National in the new year?

He worked with Justin Bieber on his recent album Believe but didn''t even make the final cut. According to Bieber''s manager, it didn''t ''make sense'' to include Ye and JB''s collab on the little tyke''s album. The question is, did it ever exist? Yes, unfortunately.

Kanye appeared on Keeping Up With The Kardashians. The man who created My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy decided to make his TV debut on the reality show, and on it he looked like Kim''s shy and sensitive security guard that''s secretly in love with her. Smooth.

He wants to release an album made up completely of animal noises. According to the Sun, the rapper is "obsessed with roars, barks and jungle noises", and that the idea of an album comprising solely of them, "is ingenious".

He gives his girlfriend Fashion advice. According to one of The Daily Mail's sources, Kanye said Kim needs to 'evolve as a fashion icon'. Coming from the man who pioneered those cartoon-ish slatted sunglasses, maybe he should just shush his noise...

He named a song ''Theraflu''; the brand name of an American cough and cold remedy. The track that Kanye made with DJ Khaled has since been renamed ''Cold'', but for a while there, Americans were wondering what was going on. It''s like Wiley calling a track ''Calpol''. Actually that could happen.

He's launching a line of shoes with his gilrfriend. Kanye obviously thought the best way of ensuring his girlfriend would 'evolve into a fashion icon', would be to design her shoes for her. Yes they're hideous, but they're worth loads of money, and that's all that matters.

Kim appears in his new video for the track ''Cold''. Just spend five minutes apart please guys! It must be written in their relationship contract that at no point can the couple be more than five yards apart. It''s like the opposite of a restraining order, and it gets you loads of publicity.