'Eurovision Song Contest 2006: The Official Album' (EMI) Released 08/05/06

The only reason Eurovision is fun is because you can take the piss out of Terry Wogan, so it remains a mystery as to why anyone would want to own such a CD, except perhaps as a way of annoying the neighbours? This collection of 40 songs all appear to merge into one huge mass of Euro-pop and it seems slightly ironic that many of the entrants of this contest are only not part of the E.U but countries like Turkey and Israel are not even part of the European continent.

The Portuguese entry will catch your attention, only to let you down just as you’re getting excited and you may well find yourself drifting off in to a world of happiness whilst listening to the French entry, only to realise that it’s the accent that reminds you of soothing lament of Monsieur Henri, as opposed to the fact this is a decent song. The German's offering is interesting to say the least, with a little bit of country and western, mixed with traditionally pap rhyming lyrics.

Luckily for Eurovision and death metal fans The Finnish entry is a totally refreshing track by Lordi, entitled ‘Hard Rock Hallelujah’ and deserves to win the competition if only for its originality and the fact it encapsulates the true essence of Eurovision: shock, cheese and utter insanity.

One question this album poses is what happened to the fun and energy behind former British winning songs like Sandi Shaw's ‘Puppet on a String’ and Bucks Fizz's 'Making Your Mind Up'? Now the trick seems to be to enter a song which Lloyd Webber would be proud of, for example the Swiss entry entitled ‘If We All Give a Little’. This is a song worthy of a couple of stools and a stage full of singers dressed in white. It will certainly make you smile, cringe and cringe a little more.

Given the fact that our Great British nation is envied the world over for our strong musical talent, why do we insist on entering a totally embarrassing contestant such as Daz?  First of all the man is named after a washing powder and secondly he can’t sing and is making a mockery of British music!!! The final entry on this bizarre collection comes from Ukraine under the guise of Tina Karol. Whilst I imagine this stands a fair chance of winning, it would be a lot easier to favour the classic Latin American rhythms if it wasn’t for the nagging feeling that she sounds like someone else. Yep, she has ripped off Shakira. But credit to Tina Karol, she does sound good.

The Eurovision Song Contest: a national institution which comes but once a year, but now you can cherish the excitement of the night on a double disc CD, yours to keep forever! What more could you possibly want?